Wednesday, November 19, 2014

The Shadow’s Farewell (update 1119)



The Shadow’s Farewell
Lu Xun, 9/24/1924
Tr. Huiwen Zhang, 11/21/2012, updated 11/19/2014

When in sleep the time comes that man no longer knows the time, there will be a shadow coming to bid farewell, saying—

If there is that which I do not fancy in Heaven, I am unwilling to go; if there is that which I do not fancy in Hell, I am unwilling to go; if there is that which I do not fancy in your future Golden World, I am unwilling to go.
Yet you are that which I do not fancy.
Friend, I no longer want to follow you, I am unwilling to stay.
I am unwilling!
Woe World Woe World—I am unwilling, I would rather wander across the free-falling ground.

              I am but a shadow, wanting to bid you farewell and drown in darkness.  Yet darkness again will engulf me, yet sunlight again will make me fade away.
Yet I am unwilling to wander between light and dark, I would rather drown in darkness.

Yet I in the end wander between light and dark; I know not whether it is dusk or dawn.  I but raise an ashen-black hand for now as if to empty a glass of wine.  When the time comes that I no longer know the time, I will venture far alone.
Woe World Woe World—if it were dusk, black night would surely come to drown me, or I would be faded away by white day, if it were dawn.
Friend, the time is near.
I will dive into darkness and wander across the free-falling ground.
You are still expecting my farewell gift.  What on earth can I bestow?  Nothing, or the usual dark and void, nothing more.  But I want to be only the dark, so I may fade away in your white day; I want to be only the void, so I shall never occupy the ground of your heart.

I want it this way, friend—
I am venturing far alone, neither with you, nor with other shadows in darkness.  Only I am drowned in darkness; the world wholly belongs to me.


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